I 'Eight' It All! Chili



Today is my older brother, Matthew’s birthday.

If he were still with us, he’d be turning 60 years old today. Instead, he’ll forever be a young, goofy but brilliant, 26 year old engineer, unafflicted with the arthritis, declining eye sight, and other maladies of age I’m beginning to experience.

I’m posting this recipe in honor of him, because of his love of chili and cornbread, both of which he could put down in extraordinary quantities (6’5” after all…)

And after consumption, I swear he could have provided enough natural gas to fuel a third world country! With 8 cans of beans, I’m sure this is one recipe he would both find fulfilling and get immense devilish glee from!

Make it with ground beef or turkey, or leave the meat out all-together and have a delicious, yet still quite musical, vegan meal.


  • 2 cans White Beans (drained)

  • 2 cans Chili Beans (seasoned pintos, not drained)

  • 2 cans Pinto Beans (unseasoned, drained)

  • 2 cans Kidney Beans (drained)

  • 2 tablespoons of cooking oil - your choice

  • 1 Red Bell Pepper, diced

  • 1 large Yellow Onion, diced

  • 2 cans Ro*Tel Diced Tomatoes

  • 2 cans Diced Tomatoes (w/green pepper & onion)

  • 2 cans Diced Tomatoes

  • 2 pkgs dry Chili Seasoning (to taste)

  • 1-2 cups of Water

  • 3-4 tablespoons granulated Sugar

  • 1 ½ pounds of Ground beef or Turkey, browned and fat drained

  • Salt & Pepper (to taste)

  • Red Pepper Flakes (to taste)


  1. Sauté pepper and onion in large stock pot until onions are tender and translucent.

  2. Add ground meat to pepper/onion and cook until brown.

  3. Open Everything! That’s the most difficult part of this recipe (all that thumb exercise!)

  4. Add everything on the ingredient list to the large stock pot.

  5. Stir together, cook at a simmer for 2-4 hours, just enough to let all the flavors combine; stirring occasionally.

  6. If desired, top with shredded cheddar cheese, sour cream & green onion.

  7. Serve with a nice chunk of cornbread with butter and honey!

  • This also a very good crockpot recipe, but you’ll want to cut the recipe in half to make everything fit!

Happy Birthday Matt! Thanks for taking care of my boys up there in heaven. I’m sure you’re eating chili, watching Blazing Saddles, and laughing your heads off together!